Tired

My brain just works how it works

It's a blessing and a curse

At the same time

You can't order it to be different

And neither can I

It could change a bit

With excessive amounts of therapy

(Hopefully)

That I'm unfortunately 

Not willing to give to it

At this point in my life

And actually

I am a little bit sorry

For all the trouble

I'm putting you through

I just can't be bothered anymore

To care about anything

Least of all

About making myself (feel) better

In sustainable and healthy ways

I'm too tired for that shit right now.